Should I Stay or Should I Go? Surviving a Relationship with a Narcissist

Emotional abuse is a very serious problem and should not be tolerated, but at what point is someone *not* a narcissist, according to the author? It is important to know that authentic narcissists have developed that grandiosity to protect themselves against perceived threats, many times as a response to trauma in their upbringing. They are not *just* bad people who can't love you the way you need to be loved immediately --- in fact, isn't requiring other people to do that the very definition of narcissism? It seems that people forget that at its core, narcissism is an (albeit annoying) attempt at self-preservation. I just feel this discourse in the book would be more healing and helpful to all to not just vilify people for their personality disorders and maybe offer guidance in how to build self-awareness/insight for the people who hurt us.